swatting flies and putting out fires

Monday I watched both of my nephews for a few hours, and we had quite the flurry of activity.

First, we stopped at Quicktrip; Talon had enough money to buy a bag of chips for himself and another one for Charlie. I found it very sweet that he considered his brother without being told, so I agreed to buy whatever drinks they wanted to go with their chips. Five minutes later, I left the store feeling I'd barely escaped with my life.

Talon wanted a 32 oz. fountain drink--he rationalized this by explaining it was the same price as the little drink Charlie wanted, and who am I to argue? So while Charlie chose from Booger Berry and whatever other bizarre flavors his drink came in, Talon filled his giant cup with some kind of red soda.

Charlie finally settled on a flavor, and I grabbed a soda for myself. All was well until Talon went to put the lid on his drink and--bless his heart--spilled the whole thing all over the place. Anxious to finish up and get out before we were kicked out, I asked what was in the cup so I could get him a new drink.

"It's mix of, like, four different things," he said sheepishly.

"Never mind," I said and sent him to ask someone to bring a mop while I sopped up some of the red stuff. Charlie tagged along behind him, dropping his own drink as he ran. Luckily that one was in a sealed plastic bottle, so a second disaster was averted--mostly. Talon made another drink, comprised mostly of Mountain Dew and cherry syrup, and I put the lid on it for him.

By the time we got to the counter, Charlie's drink was leaking on his hands. So the clerk took it away and told us to get another one. We had to go through the whole selecting-a-flavor dilemma one more time, and finally we were headed to the car with strict orders not to open ANYTHING until we got home.

Back at the house, Talon and I had some homework to do. I'd bought him several kinds of rocks & minerals in Hot Springs, and he wanted to label them and take them to school. So we sat at the kitchen table with my laptop and his rocks and started googling.

I knew this would be a bit of a challenge, as three-year-old Charlie is chock full of energy and requires constant conversation. What I didn't expect was for my dad to be the one who couldn't leave us in peace for five minutes!

Alas, my dad turns into 6'3'' child when my nephews are around, and he also happens to be utterly helpless without my mom. Unfortunately, Mom got a phone call and was not available to distract Charlie or Dad while Talon and I tried to get some work done. Within seconds, my dad was at the table with us, broken glasses in hand. He couldn't see to fix them, so he had to have Talon help him find the loose screw and put it back in.

(Pun not intended, but funny nonetheless.)

After several minutes of ridiculous commotion, Dad and Charlie finally went back to the living room. But within minutes, Dad was calling "I need the flyswatter!"

A wasp had come in through the fireplace, and instead of getting up to find the flyswatter like any able-bodied, able-minded adult, Dad sent Charlie after it (likely having first sent Charlie to ask my mom where it was--helpless, I tell you!). I tried to tune them out, but then I looked up to find Charlie coming through the kitchen with a watering can.

"That's not a flyswatter," Dad cried. "Katy, help him find the flyswatter."

"Not water," I explained to Charlie, laughing. "The flyswatter...to swat flies."

"He knows what a flyswatter is," Talon called from the kitchen.

"Oh yeah?" I answered from the pantry. "He's pointing at a bottle of vinegar right now."

Talon giggled.

After an eternity, Mom finished her phone call and found the damn flyswatter. By then I'd given up and told Talon he'd have to the label the other half of his rocks with his teacher's help. Their mom would be arriving any minute to pick them up.

It's a good thing I didn't find the flyswatter myself; I'd have used it on my dad.